"—E’en then would be some stooping; and I choose
Never to stoop. Oh sir, she smiled, no doubt,
Whene’er I passed her; but who passed without
Much the same smile? This grew; I gave commands;
Then all smiles stopped together."
- Robert Browning, "My Last Duchess"
Tonight I am listening to this playlist. This is the sort of music I have come to like best, a soundscape of a certain grimmer note. It is is comforting; it relaxes me and enables my focus. It allows thought to rest with crystal cold in my brainpan.
I believe that everyone has music that speaks to them. Dark ambient seems to speak best to me. Perhaps it complements my outlook on things. Perhaps I just like dissonance or unsettling noise. It does not matter; what matters is that I know what I like and seek out what I like. The one mistake I avoid is assuming that others will share my tastes unilaterally; this is definitely not so.
"The needle slips in and out
Never was one more pricked by poison
Then by that transcribed in clear detail.
Who says the sword is mightier? Certainly
Not the proverb."
- Gustav Hendricks, "Does the Ball have a Point?"
I am currently attempting to create a complete chronology of Doctor Who. I had created one previously, separated into Old and New Who sections, but my roommate AliQ told me that it was too restricted in what was decided as canon. I completely disagree, but I concede the point; this is a more inclusive chronology. Anyway, the main source that I am using is the Doctor Who Reference Guide. It is the most complete listing of media that I am aware of.
And it is finished, in its basic form. I'll have to go over it later and proof it.
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
In principio erat nisi.
"You are the sound that I hear.
You are the sound that I hear.
We're not standing.
We're falling."
- Fever Ray, "The Wolf"
I do not know why I am doing this blog. I really do not. Lately I have become convinced that I am probably mad and creating a blog ex nihilo for no purpose whatsoever seems to fit the profile of madness, but beyond that flimsy excuse for reasoning I cannot come up with a damn thing. I do know that I say 'madness' because I have never been diagnosed with a mental issue of any sort (and I doubt I will ever be), but I am also too quirked and strange-thinking to be anything other than eccentric. Except I am not rich, therefore I cannot be eccentric. So I must be mad.
We will not talk about how that string of thinking is maddening.
I suppose part of a maybe reason to do a blog is that everyone that I know seems to have Something To Say, important things or studious and erudite things or interesting things. I do not have any important or erudite or interesting things to say. I do not even feel that I have wise things to say. I do not know what to say; I have spent my life feeling that way and I do not think that will change. I rarely consider what I have to say to be important or worthwhile or any sort of thing worth listening to. I have been told that most people feel that way. To quote:
"You want to be famous and rich and happy
But you're terrified you have nothing to offer this world
Nothing to say and no way to say it
But you can say it in three languages"
- KMFDM, "Dogma"
Except that is not the real quote. The lyrics for Dogma are spoken by Nicole Blackman and those same lyrics are a short rewrite of her poem/spoken word "Indictment", which may be found in her book Blood Sugar. I prefer "Indictment", even though it is without any punctuation at all. While "Dogma" is succinct, "Indictment" tells the whole tale.
See? Nothing important there. No insight. Just regurgitation of fact.
In the space of silence since I wrote that I closed my eyes. I had a vision of a body hanging from a noose, no details, all in shadow, but it was swinging. You could hear the creaking of the beam, see the sway of shadowed body as it goes from side to side. The room was dusty, all made of wood - you could smell the dust.
Kitzmiller v. Dover (2005) is one of the most fascinating court cases to read, primarily because of its ultimate scathing destruction of YECreationist/ID attempts to embed itself permanently in the fabric of science. Everyone should read about it.
See? Non sequiturs. Things that pop through my brain one by one. There is an actual running link between Fever Ray, my inadequacy of speech, Nicole Blackman, a vision of a hanged body, and Kitzmiller, a logic path that I can barely describe in its convolutions.
I am tired. There is nothing to see here.
You are the sound that I hear.
We're not standing.
We're falling."
- Fever Ray, "The Wolf"
I do not know why I am doing this blog. I really do not. Lately I have become convinced that I am probably mad and creating a blog ex nihilo for no purpose whatsoever seems to fit the profile of madness, but beyond that flimsy excuse for reasoning I cannot come up with a damn thing. I do know that I say 'madness' because I have never been diagnosed with a mental issue of any sort (and I doubt I will ever be), but I am also too quirked and strange-thinking to be anything other than eccentric. Except I am not rich, therefore I cannot be eccentric. So I must be mad.
We will not talk about how that string of thinking is maddening.
I suppose part of a maybe reason to do a blog is that everyone that I know seems to have Something To Say, important things or studious and erudite things or interesting things. I do not have any important or erudite or interesting things to say. I do not even feel that I have wise things to say. I do not know what to say; I have spent my life feeling that way and I do not think that will change. I rarely consider what I have to say to be important or worthwhile or any sort of thing worth listening to. I have been told that most people feel that way. To quote:
"You want to be famous and rich and happy
But you're terrified you have nothing to offer this world
Nothing to say and no way to say it
But you can say it in three languages"
- KMFDM, "Dogma"
Except that is not the real quote. The lyrics for Dogma are spoken by Nicole Blackman and those same lyrics are a short rewrite of her poem/spoken word "Indictment", which may be found in her book Blood Sugar. I prefer "Indictment", even though it is without any punctuation at all. While "Dogma" is succinct, "Indictment" tells the whole tale.
See? Nothing important there. No insight. Just regurgitation of fact.
In the space of silence since I wrote that I closed my eyes. I had a vision of a body hanging from a noose, no details, all in shadow, but it was swinging. You could hear the creaking of the beam, see the sway of shadowed body as it goes from side to side. The room was dusty, all made of wood - you could smell the dust.
Kitzmiller v. Dover (2005) is one of the most fascinating court cases to read, primarily because of its ultimate scathing destruction of YECreationist/ID attempts to embed itself permanently in the fabric of science. Everyone should read about it.
See? Non sequiturs. Things that pop through my brain one by one. There is an actual running link between Fever Ray, my inadequacy of speech, Nicole Blackman, a vision of a hanged body, and Kitzmiller, a logic path that I can barely describe in its convolutions.
I am tired. There is nothing to see here.
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